Hello and welcome to Game of Thoughts! This is a feature in which I do recaps of the current episodes, as they are. They are nothing more than a recap and chance for GoT fans to have a bit of a natter and react as situations permit. They were inspired by the incredible, in-depth and insightful posts of Patrick Sponaugle, except his are intelligent and mine are just squeeing. They WILL contain spoilers.
Let’s DO THIS!
Dany’s back, y’all! It seems pretty clear to me they’re holding Drogon back for a Big Moment. So that means there is a moment coming up that is bigger than burning like fifteen khals to death at once. Also, I noted that Jorah could not keep his eyes downcast in respect because Danaerys’s girls were out, despite the gravity of the situation. He’s That Guy.
- Sansa And the Podlings Arrive At Castle Black – Beautifully done. The reveal of the doors opening was so great, starting on Sansa but showing that it’s really Brienne riding point for defense purposes. Tormund is all over Brienne and continuing to give some champion level eyebrow game. Sansa stands up, asks Jon to do the same. Brienne makes a point to remind Davos and Melisandre that she swore an oath to avenge Renly, and also to point out that she has personal knowledge of Stannis’s death because she cut his goddamn head off. Melisandre continues to have doubts about her misplaced faith, if not her power.
- Missandei and Gray Worm Fighting the Good Fight – They aren’t down with Tyrion’s laissez-faire attitude toward slavery and have no problem letting him know. Also, Missandei wins this episode for calling out Tyrion’s bullshit ‘I was totally a slave for like ten whole minutes so I know all about it’ argument. EXCELLENT WORK, MADAME. Gray Worm comes in close second by not only arguing with Tyrion, but grabbing his arm which is a big deal for a lot of reasons, none of which I have time to go into now. I really like how conflicted the situation is – it’s a total quagmire in Meereen and the best thing these people could do is leave. Varys had no lines but didn’t need any, because Varys.
- Dany And The Retired Wives – Dany has a friend! Yay! Also poor Jorah is just looking more and more decrepit. Sand, Jorah? Really? Shame. Which brings me to…
- SHAME NUN! – Look into my eyes and tell me you can’t imagine her toe-to-toe with Dead Mountain. Battle for the ages, right there.
- Jonathan Pryce Continues to Give Solid Crazy – Mr. Pryce is one of those actors who can be so charming and disarming and then fly right off the rails into a smoldering volcano of deep-earth crazy. I’ve said for years that his darker moments resonate with a ‘I know what your underwear smells like’ vibe and this scene supports that interpretation. I like how Margaery is clearly processing what he’s saying, showing that once again, her oatmeal has some delicious beans of cunning floating around in there.
- Is The Weather Shitty? Congratulations, You’re in Pyke! – I liked this scene with Theon and Yara, despite how rough it was. Yara is angry for a lot of reasons, but seeing Theon broken makes her realize that and get over it. Theon is back in the company of someone badass who will protect him. It’s not Sansa’s group, but I’ll take it. I just won’t like it.
- Maester Whozits Taking Forever to Circle That Table- DELIGHTFUL. Just to get Cersei’s goat… brilliant! We know he’s faking, we’ve known since… what, season 1? Even odds he tosses out a game-changing move at the midnight hour, bodily picks up Jaime and Cersei in each hand and throws them off Maegor’s keep. Come on, hundred to one. Also I mentally named 8 maesters before I accepted that I cannot remember his name, but he’s lasted this long so he’s got to have an ace up his sleeve of some kind.
- The Lannisters Continuing to Plot – Jaime’s plot to un-storm the Sept made zero sense to me but perhaps I’ll understand better tomorrow. Also, the refrain of The Reynes of Castamere in the score – SNAP!! Damned good work, showrunners. Ser Dead Mountain was not in this scene because he was in storage. I’m sure when it’s hot outside he’s hard to be around, kind of like when you drive past the dump on a hot day.
- This Table Is For Decent People Only – Sorry kids, you have to be a decent person to sit at this table in Castle Black. Was there a direct cut between the King’s Landing Small Council scene and this one? If there was – FORESHADOWING, and if not, well, I tried. Tormund was making out with that chicken leg at Brienne, and Edd makes a surprise pass at Sansa, who politely accepts without committing. They would not make the weirdest couple on this show. Ramsey writes shitty and gross letters, to the surprise of no one. Which brings me to…
- OSHA!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! – Ramsey Bolton has read my diary and is out to destroy all that I love. I spent two hours washing and waxing my car in 90-degree heat on Saturday, and if I walk out tomorrow to find him taking a dump on the hood I will not be surprised. I will be very disappointed, and also late to work, but not surprised. Natalie Tena came back for that? UGH. Fingers crossed she will come back as a zombie and tear his head off, but I’m not holding my breath.
- Jorah and Bearded Hair Model – Daario, just stop talking. I kind of wish they’d written you out and Jorah got sunstroke, lost his marbles, and is carrying around a beachball with a face on it. No disrespect to the Daario actor, who is doing his best. I wish it was you in that alley instead of Barristan Selmy … THERE, I SAID IT.
- The Return of Sweetrobin – Who seemed to be observing some of Littlefinger’s duplicitous game, but also seems to be morphing into Joffrey 2.0. He runs like a goon and that hair and outfit make him look like The Spleen from Mystery Men, aka the disco guy who could control his farts. Poor kid. I hope he’s more together than he seems, and I was sure somebody was getting birded to death.
So that’s the recap of The Book of the Stranger! We’re almost halfway through what’s been a super exciting and well-written season so far, and I can’t wait to see what happens next. Have a great week, and take care of yourself!