In Theaters Now: IT (and also I am still alive!)

Orlando and the rest of the Southeast was recently lambasted by Hurricane Irma, and we were very, VERY fortunate that it had calmed down to a Category 3 and lost strength as it crept up the country’s phallus. Millions are still without power, including civic infrastructure (you never miss streetlights until you don’t have them and realize not everyone knows what to do when they go out) and businesses. The islands were trashed, as the news footage has shown. Apparently Jose’s still out doodling around in the Atlantic, so until that goes away we won’t really be able to unclench and get on with things. 

Happily my power only flickered, although I was without internet until Tuesday night and my yard was full of branches. 

IT2017
He was right, I did float. 

So fitting that one of my favorite stories involving a giant storm hits theaters just as a giant storm hits my state. ART IMITATING LIFE.

As far as IT goes, I enjoyed what was onscreen, but I can’t help but miss everything that didn’t make it, and lament some of the bigger changes. I’ll put these behind a cut to to avoid posting spoilers, but if you’ve seen the movie and want to discuss please jump in!

Continue reading “In Theaters Now: IT (and also I am still alive!)”

Hell Is Other People – The Amityville Horror (2005)

Anyway, I can’t help but writhe in frustration at the squandered opportunity here. I can’t help it! There was a fascinating movie in there someplace, and it got caught between the wheels of marketable, facile horror movie and slavish recreation of original.

October is Horror Movie month, where we let down our hair and celebrate all things macabre and scary! Not that we don’t during the rest of the year, but still… HORROR MOVIES! People who don’t like horror are encouraged to check back November 1st for less bloody and/or disturbing films. For everyone else, let’s put on our galoshes and WADE INTO THE MIRE!

Hello and welcome to Hell Is Other People* week here at Late to the Theater!This week’s selections are all about the biggest threat facing modern mankind –other people. All this week’s selections take place in Suburbia, and while they might feature supernatural flourishes, people tend to be the at the root of the problem. So throw some plastic flamingos on your lawn and turn up the music; we’re going to get a visit from the concerned people at our HOA**!

Note: Due to lack of planning on the author’s part, the role of Poltergeist will be played by the 2005 version of The Amityville Horror, for the following reasons:

  • Poltergeist isn’t on Netflix and I can’t afford to buy it/am too afraid to illegally download it
  • I watched TAH the other day and had Opinions
  • It fits into this week’s theme of Hell Is Other People

So here we go!

amityville_cover

Continue reading “Hell Is Other People – The Amityville Horror (2005)”

Oh, For Heaven’s SAKE…

Some folks in the comments on that post have suggested gender-swapping Jareth and starring someone like Tilda Swinton (SWINTON) or Annie Lennox.

 

Look, I know a lot of people on the East Coast are having Real World Problems right now due to Winter Storm Jonas. That really sucks, and having myself lived through some hurricanes that caused massive wreckage, my heart goes out to them on this Monday morning. I hope you all make it to work if you can, and if you can’t, may your power be unflagging and your internet connection without lag. 

That said, I have to talk about this:

Sorry Everyone, a Labyrinth Reboot is In the Works

I’m not going on a tear about how this is destroying my childhood or whatever. Things change, the center cannot hold, and any thing that generates buzz is considered up for grabs for a remake. I will always have the original. And hey, Guardians of the Galaxy turned out to be a hell of a great surprise, AND they have an actual Henson involved! We shall see.

Continue reading “Oh, For Heaven’s SAKE…”

In Lieu of Real Content, Another Link!

Taking a break at work I read this wonderful hilarious article from the wonderful hilarious people at Filmdrunk, a publication combining two of my favorite things. GOD can they do comedy!

Forgive me!

I have been lazy!

Well, not lazy. I work 40 hours a week and then write between 20 and 30 the rest, on top of housework, social engagements, reading, cooking, and exercise. I haven’t been this productive in YEARS and it is awesome.

But I have been a lazy blogger!

And I’m doing it again! 

Taking a break at work I read this wonderful hilarious article from the wonderful hilarious people at Filmdrunk, a publication combining two of my favorite things. GOD can they do comedy!

Please enjoy this post of theirs, which boiled down is basically The Rock Should Be In All the Remakes.

8 Movies We Should Remake With The Rock.

The “Jaws” poster had me crying at my desk. I’m not even playing.

ALSO –

Anybody else on the edge of their seat for the Hannibal premier tonight? I hope they stream it right away like they did with Constantine!